The Autoimmune Protocol

The Autoimmune Protocol

Let’s talk food. Specifically, let’s talk Autoimmune Protocol food.   An Autoimmune Disease Diagnosis I recently shared my Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis diagnosis, and what I’m doing about it. My first line of defense was supplements to combat my body’s inflammation. Next, while I determine my route for thyroid hormone supplementation, I’m working to heal my gut […]
When the immune system goes rogue: Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis

When the immune system goes rogue: Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis

I was recently diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis, an autoimmune disease where the immune system attacks the thyroid. The diagnosis wasn’t necessarily a shock, however, the emotional weight of an autoimmune disease was. So let's start talking about it.
Mt. Baldy – an Adventure Recap

Mt. Baldy – an Adventure Recap

There’s a fine line between badassery and stupidity, and in trail running you often straddle it.  “We’re not going there are we?” We stood at the Mt. Baldy trailhead, necks craned to see the snow-covered ridge. I fiddled with my handheld as I watched the hikers around me affix ice axes to their packs and adjust […]
Let’s adventure, I’m coaching!

Let’s adventure, I’m coaching!

I’m coaching! I’m officially opening up coaching services for road runners, trail runners, weekend warriors, triathletes, and adventurers of all abilities and goals. I offer personalized one-on-one coaching, tailored training plans, and distance-specific training plans to help you accomplish your goal, whether that be consistency in your daily training or your first Ironman. How does […]
Coming Home

Coming Home

Nine months ago, my psychologist recommended I go on antidepressants. I was numb. Detached. Passively watching the world fade in and out of focus. I lived in the spaces between panic attacks, and my disordered behaviors around food and training intensified. I was claustrophobic, trapped inside a version of myself I no longer recognized. Since that appointment, I’ve made some major life changes. I quit my job and co-founded a nonprofit. I admitted to myself, and the world, that I have an eating disorder. I prioritized my health and wellbeing above my professional endeavors. I stopped asking for permission. I allowed myself to dream again. I also booked a month-long trip to Colorado.
I am an active woman. At any weight.

I am an active woman. At any weight.

I finished up the appointment and walked into that stagnant waiting room elated. I was overwhelmed with a sense of pride for my body, for its health and resilience. Its strength and curves. Being a woman no longer seems like a burden, and being an active woman no longer seems so well-defined. I am an active woman. At any weight.
Lighting the Flame

Lighting the Flame

My first-ever run was on a hot summer afternoon at sixth grade cross-country practice. I hated it. Every afternoon I purposely ran on roots, sticks, and uneven ground hoping I would trip, fall, break an ankle, and never have to run again. I quit the team within two weeks. Three months later, I was watching […]
NEDA Week Day 7: Lane 9, a Project

NEDA Week Day 7: Lane 9, a Project

NEDAwareness Week Day 7: Welcome to the Ninth Lane I wanted gloves. It was a cold Saturday morning when we came together, and my fingers were pressed tightly within my thin sleeves. Jacket gloves, some would say. We were meeting by a nearby trail, a good friend of mine and a new friend. She was […]
NEDA Week Day 6: Today

NEDA Week Day 6: Today

NEDAwareness Week Day 6: Silencing the Internal Critic When I originally embarked on sharing my story, I thought I was in a place where I could separate myself from who I used to be – detach my present identity from this battle that consumed the greater part of my adolescence. I envisioned a polished essay […]
NEDA Week Day 5: Treatment

NEDA Week Day 5: Treatment

NEDAwareness Week Day 5: Asking for Help It was 9 p.m. on a Wednesday somewhere in the middle of Kansas. I scrolled through the pale pink web page, eyes squinting in my phone’s harsh light. I was partway through a cross-country drive, eventually landing in San Diego, Calif. for a summer internship. I was also […]
NEDA Week Day 4: Eating Disorder, defined

NEDA Week Day 4: Eating Disorder, defined

NEDAwareness Week Day 4: Defining an Eating Disorder The room smelled familiar – like antiseptic soap and one too many sprays of Febreeze. I shifted on the table, wincing as the paper scratched against the cheap leather. I had just finished another round of the Gardasil vaccine and inquired about remedies for dry skin – my […]
NEDA Week Day 3: Running Away

NEDA Week Day 3: Running Away

NEDA Week Day 3: A (complicated) relationship with running I started running when I was 12. The sport taught me resilience and the merits of grit and determination. During a time of social angst and growing academic stress, running was my sanctuary. It freed me from my anxiety and fears – every mile a reprieve […]
NEDA Week Day 2: Perfectionism

NEDA Week Day 2: Perfectionism

NEDAwareness Week Day 2: The Burden of Perfection I have always been prone to anxiety. I remember sitting in pre-algebra, my right arm warm from the dusty projector crammed between my desk and a peer’s. The week’s fraction quiz glared at me with a large red C circled in the top right corner. A brick […]
NEDA Week Day 1: Anxiety

NEDA Week Day 1: Anxiety

NEDAwareness Week Day 1: Coping with Anxiety For me, disordered eating and anxiety are intertwined. They feed off of each other until I am hollow. It’s a parasitic emptiness, one that consumes your every thought and action until you are emotionally void. The cycle is cruel – anxiety begets restriction and shame; restriction and shame beget anxiety. […]
It’s Time to Talk About It

It’s Time to Talk About It

It’s National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. And this year’s theme is “It’s Time to Talk About It.”  Talking about mental illness is hard. The stigma, the shame, the embarrassment. it leaves little room for recovery and community, little space to grow and heal. But it is time to talk about it. It is time to […]
Three months in a new home

Three months in a new home

  No Service read across the top of my phone screen. I looked up to see speckles of sunlight peer through the leaves. A chorus of cicadas echoed, and a subtle, unassuming creek flowed in the background. The soft, humid air enveloped me, and each breath was matched with sweet, fresh relief. The stillness was […]
Taking Root

Taking Root

  There’s this tree on Roosevelt Island. Or at least there was. Toppled onto its side, roots and limbs exposed, trunk decaying – uprooted. I ran by this tree nearly every day during my first month here. Sometimes I wouldn’t notice it, other times I would stop and stare. At one point I stopped and […]
Finding Home: Washington D.C. Edition

Finding Home: Washington D.C. Edition

It’s okay to be afraid leaving the only home I’ve ever known. It’s okay to be apprehensive in new situations and challenges. It’s okay to be lonely. I have given myself permission to feel sadness, to stop resisting the uncertainty and fear, and in this grief, I have made space. Space to grow and learn. Space to fill with new experiences, opportunities, and relationships. By acknowledging and accepting the grief, anxiety, and loss over who I was, I can finally embrace who I am becoming.
Where is my bro tank?

Where is my bro tank?

The gown engulfed me. It was nicer than our gowns in high school – more legitimate and regal. Just as I felt. I stood to address the small crowd – we were each told to say a few words of gratitude, perhaps share a memory or two. I felt put together and at ease standing […]

The Ethics of Reproductive Rights, featuring Beyonce

I just completed my training as a moderator in democratic deliberation in anticipation of a forum with Indiana University’s Political and Civic Engagement Program (PACE). The forum is part of an annual campus-wide deliberation on various – and often controversial – topics. This year the topic is abortion and reproductive rights. Insert bioethics everywhere. The topic of reproductive rights, particularly […]